Monday, June 06, 2005
...om*...1stlty i wan 2 sorry 2 all ppl..if i offend any1...2day coz i reali kinda of..mad..or u call dat insane...sorry for being rude or wat..well..i guez i m fine...no worries...and ya great dat ma demonic maid left..and gt new maid...BUT she onli wil come on 30th of May..wat de...between tiz times...no1 wil do hsewrk onli ma mom..i tink and ma sis...and guez wat..last time happen once..and...u noe wat happen..chaotic at home man...coz every1 is fasturated in ma family...except me...yahs..and u noe wat?..i during dat time was like getting scolded for nth,...and quaralle everyday...is like no peace...anything dat is nth also wana find something quaralle..obvious i m nt de 1..coz i love peace..of ma ear..i haf sensitive ear btw...arrrr...haiz..dat hell days r coming again..and watz worst is dat it is holiday lor...wah pian sianz lor...even worst at least go sch no need 2 c ma fam..lousy family...coz they dun even understand me smt..i juz kept quiet feel like screaming at them...but nah..they stil ma parents..and guez wat???...10 COMMEANDMENTS!!! HONOUR YA PARENTS...ya even they reali did rong ..GiVe iN!!!...haiz...i juz gona say 1 ting i haf no father...except Jesus..1 who loves and understands me clearer then i noe maself...some ppl shock y i say dat...well...but is true i felt..tiz wat i felt in ma heart..parents..r juz a name..yah they brought u 2 de world..but coz of God place us for a purpose...but..yah stil honour ya parents dude!...give in too much will become bad 2...k take for eg...u give in everything, do as if wat parents order and even u dun like it u juz do according 2 their will..yahs..everytime sure say itz yah own gd..blar blar blar..but if u haf no happiness & freedom.. y live in tiz world??...and y dun go for ya desire..in another words..parents who control totally over us..actualli R DREAM ROBBERS...they limit us and make us haf no dreamz but their dreams..limit 1s strength...i tink parents shld reali..reali..put and b frienz wif us...be a frien rather than b a parents...k...for eg...who do u go look for 1st in ya life if u met wif some probs???...FRIENZ of course...m i rite??,...look watz de truth and nt deny it..
JESUS IS OUR BEST FRIENZ..HOLY SPIRIT IS OUR BEST FRIEN...and cloest 2 us..onli He gives us a reason 2 live..2 fullest of our life..y?....glorifield Him...!!k for eg...if u haf parents who worship idols...and u r a believer and follower of Christ..obvious u pray that they will..u noe...repent and b saved..rite?..but every time u try something bad will happen...either u gt persercution of all activity..or being force 2 go..""temple""and parents tink wat they do is alwaz rite...we done rong...we r blamed...but when parents r rong..who is going 2 tell them???...no judgement shall b made but let God Himself judge us...hwever...y is parents stil de mst hot and comon prob in every1 of us...?..at least 8 family outta 10 will haf probs..unsolve forever..conselling dun wrk..onli if hearts r open...probs seems 2 b solve coz every1 is..
EsCaPiNg FROM THE REALITY..thats what human alwaz do best...recap and tink abt ya fam..wat u tink?? yah back 2 de above mention..perser of all act and force 2 go temple..yahs..u r supose 2 honour ya parents..and also nt 2 sin..in de sense worship idols..but put God onli and 1st in our hearts..u r trap in d midle dunoe wat 2 do...
yahs..thats de pt u tink God is 1st & onli more impt..yah??..agree so u try 2 out talk NICELY wif ya parents...but if they stil dun respect u but FORCE U..guez wat obvious u blow up..k put it another way...between God and parents who u choose..GOD!!!..yahs i wil fight and stand firm even it takes up ma life..come 2 de wrst parents dun acknoledge u & threatened u that they wil cut off relationship wif ya...u gt so fed up dat u stil stand firm and nt lose de fight...well..back again..de thing didn't happen 2 me(i mean de force go temple or watever..)..but de fight de fight of faith and threatned by ma parents happen 2 me..yahs i did give in..alot 2 til wat i haf made maself nw...a status of..of..(hard 2 tel u guys..)..well..yah...and i insisted strongly..so far from nw no persercution..or wat..coz ma parents can;t do anything wif me..coz yahs..they threatened..i noe coz they concern..but i alreadi prepared ma heart 2 dat day if they continues..wrst of all throw me outta ma hse..(for info if u dunoe..ma parents do ..do wat they say..they alwaz do wat they say..and nt kidding did hapen once..lol) and...yah anyway great ting is ma mom..can't fight me coz i strongly believe in maself and God..so she give in & wash her hands off me..BUT de biggest prob is ma stUBBORN dad..(backgrd info: he is a VERY "believer of watever his praying") no offence 2 any1..sorry if offended u..coz 2 bad i m baised coz i love ma God, Jesus..and i nt ashamed 2 proclaim..aloud 2 de world..yahs..he threaten, but he also noez his limit he also noes well..dat when i decide a thing or 2 is hard 2 change and i do haf "strong backbones"(if u duno watz dat nvrm..)..yahs if he dun acknowledge me i also DUN care..coz i haf nth 2 lose..
ever since i found Jesus..i will follow Him..i will nt lookback or tink...yah that let me wana thank 1 ppl..Mel ma best frien..coz ma parents trusted her well...so datz y can go out wif her dat time when she invite me 2 chc...well i've been waiting for a LONG TIME 2 noe Jesus..
coz since young i believe in God..dunoe which God but believe..and i m VErY interested in churches i ask ma parents..and gt scolded..and bad tings were said..tings like..they muz give their 10% 2 church is like bluffing money..i was furious & curious..they kept me protected very tigthly and gues wat..i like supa noob in pri dun even noe watz ahead of me..even de sec thingy i also dunoe lor..no commenz man...yahs..and nw i dun blamed them although i noe the truth that de 10% tithing is 2 prove that hw faithful steward we r & also it helps us 2 control our love for God is ALWAZ above money!!!..but although i try telling them they stil insit their belief, i m furious of course...but i can understand coz ppl in society r so in competition for money yah..obvious ppl like dat wld love money more than love God..coz did u noe $ is smt we c..and God is who we noe..human nature..ppl will believe more 2 wat they c..coz our faith is weak..nt strong enough..so called "live for money"...added on their hearts r harden..although it is de truth..they deny it..c hw stubborn r we human being...yahs i noe...Human r NT PERFECT..but we can wrk 2wards a better future by being more like Jesus..coz God is perfect...and nw..coz of de greatest miracle in ma life..noing Jesus...i wil nvr forgt de presence dat was there..de unfailing love..and de new begining chap of ma life purpose..All i wan 2 thank God ..and mel for bringing me 2 noe Him..i m so grateful 2 her..and nw coz of tiz ma parents realised..since they can't blame me or STOP ME..then they turn de blames 2 her..i was supa upsad..coz shez ma best frienz she did somthing great & endup getting blames..by hypocrites..(no intention of judging..but its de fact)..i juz can't stand it..it was totalli outta de world man..wat de h*%^ r they talking abt..??? r they mentalli some hw over stubborn or wat..nth beter 2 do man...
well...juz wan a peace of ma mind..i can't breath ez and let tings go ez..but nw..i've let go..ive prepare..continue 2 stand firm for God...no matter wat comes before me..i noe God will sure b there 2 help me He will NVR short-change us..and put us smt dat we can't go through..after tiiz...i gona breakfree...freedom is wat i haf ..nw i haf freedom..wat i meant is a freedom mind..i dun wan 2 let go of God's hand or forsake Him...or 2 forgt His 1st love..thats y is impt...backsliders 2 slide back..although is de mst difficult BUT i believe strongly that de love no matter wat wil..sure haf bits in their hearts..de 1st love..saving lost souls is impt..hwever we muz nt neglecct tiz..if any1 sliding away..pull them back ..
anyway...lol..abit off flow...talk 2 much oh no,..can't control...lol...back 2 the maid ting...yahs...so i confess i DUNOE HW 2 DO HSEWRK...even sweep also lor..or fold clothes..k lah..fold 2 a mess..yahs..till..then..i m so soory 2 say 2 cg ma mom wil b in supa bad mood..and tiz mth No fellowship at ma hse...sad.sad.sad..sob...gosh..wat can i do..although u guys can clean up..BUT ma mom wil b like supa bad mood lor...yahs..dat is nt nice...anyway..it will past fast..i believe in God..dat tiz time will nt b like last time ba...
I LOVE YA JESUS!!...
loving u... @ 11:08 PM
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